Sunday 31 May 2015

Beer and Football

What is it about armchair football fandom and the drinking of copious amounts of beer? It seems to be an automatic reflex at the prospect of some televised sporting action: do you want a four pack with that? I could vaguely understand it with something like cricket which is likely to go on for the best part of 5 days and include long periods of not very much happening (just tune in to Test Match Special for the craic). In fact, if actually going to the match alcohol is generally forbidden so it is far more likely that one would acquire a cup of Bovril, a scotch pie and pneumonia. Anyway, yesterday featured the Scottish Cup final, the FA Cup final and the DFB-Pokal final in quick succession so suitable amounts of Scottish, English and German beers were acquired.


The Scottish final kicked off promptly at 15:00 although I nearly missed the beginning. I had planned to take the dogs out for a walk prior to the commencement of the sporting events and associated alcoholism. Unfortunately, the dogs decided to take a quick walk around the Carron Dam nature reserve as an opportunity to “bugger off”. Sam showed up as soon as he had finished off a discarded hamburger but Eddie appeared to have disappeared into thin air and as he is as deaf as a post it is rather difficult to get his attention again. As it was, a ginger haired lad on a bike managed to find him and he appeared to have gone bog snorkelling (Eddie, that is, not the ginger haired boy who I could not thank enough.) Anyway, we managed to get back to the house with 5 minutes to spare and cracked open the first bottle of the day.

I had been looking forward to this match the most as it featured our local professional team, Falkirk, against Inverness Caledonian Thistle who had finally made it from the Highland league through to a convincing third place in the Premiership and a place in the Hampden final. Falkirk finished 5th in a surprisingly strong second tier but the smart money would have to go with the Highlanders. For the first half, this looked to be going to form as they went in at half time with a 1-0 lead. However, Falkirk dominated a second half that saw them equalise and push for a winner only to be caught on the break with 5 minutes to go. In a way it is heart-breaking but the game was a great advert for Scottish football and a boost for the game in the Highlands. Falkirk last won the cup in 1957 (before I was born) and I have seen them as beaten finalist three times since. Apparently, I am a jinx.

The FA Cup final kicked off in the early evening and I moved on to the English beers which always seem to come with peculiar names like Bishop’s Finger or Hob Goblin (although I had shied away from a Scottish beer with the charming description of “Skull Splitter”). Anyway, the FA Cup final was between Arsenal and Aston Villa (or, as the Prime Minister calls them, West Ham). I quite enjoy watching Arsenal but in the good tradition of supporting the underdog I thought I would back Aston Villa. In fact, just like Falkirk, Villa had not won the cup since 1957 so I could see the symmetry there. And in good symmetrical fashion, Villa duly lost although, unlike the spirited performance of Falkirk, the were completely played off the field by the Londoners. Villa haven’t had the best of seasons, finishing just above the relegation zone whereas Arsenal finished a comfortable third. However, one would be forgiven in thinking this was a pro-am tournament rather than a match between two teams in the same division.

I rather messed up the times for the German final which was kicking off at 20:00. It did but this was Berlin time rather than BST. This was Jürgen Klopp’s last game in charge at Dortmund. The game was against Wolfsburg, onetime Volkswagen works team and this year’s Bundesliga runner-up. It looked promising for Klopp’s send-off with a goal for Dortmund after 5 minutes. After 38 minutes they were 3-1 down and this remained for the remainder of the match – unlike my pilsner, which rapidly disappeared. So fairy tales don’t always come true (although, like Inverness, this was a first cup win for Wolfsburg). I did notice, however, that I appeared to be missing a bottle of beer and a whippet. Interestingly, both turned up together.

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