Normal For Norfolk

The annual family holiday; this year: Norfolk. I had visited Norfolk once before which was a somewhat ill-fated work related trip many years ago but it looked nice and I had always fancied a trip back there. We had booked a cottage there on the basis that a holiday residence should be at least as nice as one’s normal abode and this one even had access to a private swimming pool which was a real bonus. The only downside was the 7 hour trip to get there. At least we kept the kids amused with a variety of handheld games consoles. Maybe I could even get them as far as Cornwall in the future?

Sunday was the first full day there and after making good use of the swimming pool we went to a local pub for lunch. The lady who runs the farm where the cottage was located recommended it and it was very nice with a beer garden and a children’s play area at the back. At least I think it was nice as I sat at the table sneezing my head off with my eye’s itching and bloodshot. I haven’t really been bothered much by hayfever in  recent years but the pollen count was ridiculously high – at least by Stirlingshire standards anyway. Apparently, this was normal for Norfolk.

We stocked up at the pharmacy with every anti-histamine pill, nasal-spray and eye-drop that we could buy off-prescription and headed to the coast – specifically Cromer where I had my unfortunate work trip. The work went well but I went down with influenza (as in the real thing that can kill you – not a cold) and only just about made the drive back North. I did get into the house but couldn’t make t upstairs. This trip was much better and being on the coast the pollen levels were more bearable. We also went for a seafood lunch which was nice. Cromer Crab is the local speciality but I chickened out and went for plaice.

We also went to the coast on the Tuesday but this time to Great Yarmouth. This is more of a traditional seaside resort – i.e. lots of “attractions” designed to extract the largest amount of cash in the shortest amount of time. It’s OK for what it is but it didn’t quite have the charm of Cromer and the more traditional fish ‘n’ chips left Nina somewhat unimpressed. I did like the model village that they had there although taking a family of five in to see it really is a pain in the wallet. We did wander down to the beach but the kids seem to have my general mistrust of sea-beasties so we went back to the house for a swim.

We went out on to the Broads on the next day and I took the kids up an old wind-pump (essentially a windmill for pumping water). This was run by the National Trust and it cost a fifth of what the model village had done to take the whole family. This is the advantage of the NT – they are run by enthusiasts and are genuinely educational as well as being of general interest. I also found this on the Thursday when I took the family to Norwich Cathedral. That is actually free to go in with a voluntary donation (which I was more than happy to make). The only problem I had there was Raymond’s mistrust of all things religious and Sophia’s odd line of questioning. She asked me what one of the engravings on the floor said and I did my best to translate the Latin for her. She then asked me if there were dead bodies under the floor (there were) and if the bishops had killed them before putting them there (they hadn’t as far as I know) and also if they were put on a cross like Jesus would they come back to life? We left and went to a Spanish restaurant instead.

The last day there we were there we took the kids to Bewilderworld which is a sort of outdoor adventure playground with a tree-house theme and seemingly designed by someone who had been smoking something funny. Actually it was very well designed and for once it was possible to play with the kids in the tree-houses (and bring out the big kid in me). It was by far the most expensive of the day-trips but was worth it. However, when we got back home I asked the kids what their favourite part of the holiday was. Raymond said the swimming pool; Sophia said “when Dad got a bumble-bee out of the swimming pool” and Jake said playing on the games consoles. I can’t win. I just can’t win.